


heartlines

by hypernovaes



Category: Love Live! School Idol Project
Genre: F/F, One-Sided Attraction
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-18
Updated: 2015-07-18
Packaged: 2018-04-10 00:40:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 970
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4370516
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hypernovaes/pseuds/hypernovaes
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I wanna ruin our friendship<br/>We should be lovers instead<br/>-Jenny, Studio Killers</p>
            </blockquote>





	heartlines

**Author's Note:**

> SASO 2015 prompt fill for skylark.

Nozomi came from a family of believers and dreamers. She believed in fate and soul mates, in past lives and reincarnation. She believed in a red string of fate, tying her to her soul mate.

What a cruel twist of fate, to fall in love with her best friend.

As time wore on though, Nozomi began to wonder if she had ever really had _just_ platonic feelings for Eli Ayase. The more she thought about it, the more she doubted it. She began to become more and more certain that Nozomi Toujou had always been in love with Eli Ayase. In this life, in past lives, and probably all the other ones in centuries to come.

What a cruel twist of fate, to love someone you couldn’t have.

Just being by her side should be enough for Nozomi. And most days, it was. Nozomi took her own quiet, private joy in all the little things that they shared between each other. It was a secret kind of happiness, the feeling she felt in her chest, the knowledge that she alone was Eli’s best friend above all others. For all of Eli’s flaws and weaknesses, she rose above them time after time, proving herself and others wrong through sheer force of will.

Truly, she was an amazing person. A wonderful person.

But there was a seed of guilt in Nozomi’s chest, that squeezed her heart and made it hard for her to breathe. Wasn’t she being too selfish?

Wasn’t she lying to Eli by hiding such an important secret from her?

_Wasn’t she betraying Eli’s trust?_

It was these thoughts in her head that kept her from holding Eli’s hand for more than 10 seconds at a time. That made her pull away from what would otherwise be a too long hug. She could keep it to herself. She could love from afar. This was just how fate worked, after all.

Fate was cruel, but also so, so kind.

Who would she be, without Eli Ayase in her life? A friendly girl without friends. A kind girl with a big heart, but no one to share it with. But then she found a star, a beautiful, cold, distant star, who showed her what warmth could feel like for the first time in her life.

The warmth Eli offered her was unlike anything Nozomi had ever felt before. Now and then, Nozomi wondered if she wasn’t just confusing platonic feelings for romantic. Eli was her first friend, after all. Couldn’t this all just be in her head, and she was thinking too much on it?

But no.

Nozomi had a family, though they had never really felt like family to her. And even less so, now that she was living on her own.

The girls in μ’s were like sisters and daughters to her. She loved each and every one of them, from the sweet Hanayo to the loud Honoka. They were her family. Each and every one of them was precious to her, and each one of them held a piece of her heart.

For Eli Ayase, though, Nozomi knew she would gladly give her entire heart to the girl. Eli was so much more than just a friend to Nozomi. Eli was her confidant, her cheerleader, her support, her everything.

Sometimes, when Nozomi stood off by herself and quietly watched μ’s from the sidelines, she couldn’t help but entertain the thought that she and Eli were the group’s parents.

She couldn’t help but think, for just a moment, how nice it would be, someday, to raise a family with Erichi-

Those thoughts never lasted long.

Already, Nozomi could see the future in her mind’s eye, like she was looking into a crystal ball like the one her grandma had owned. Eli would be a success. She would take the world by storm, win the hearts of millions in her own way. With her not quite there smile that just barely upturned the corners of her lips, giving her a coy look like she knew a secret that she wasn’t going to share. Some lucky man would catch her eye. Someday, he would get down on one knee. Everyone would be invited to the wedding. Eli would cry tears of joy.

And Nozomi would be by her side, helping her fix her hair. Holding the train of her gown. Wishing Eli all the happiness in the world. Because that was all she really wanted for her best friend, in the end.

She deserved so much happiness.

There was no future Nozomi could see, where she and Eli would fall in love like they did in the fairy tales she had liked so much as a child. Fate didn’t always mean you would wind up living happily ever after with the person on the other end of the string. But she was okay with that. Really, she was.

If it meant Eli’s happiness, Nozomi would give up all her happy endings, just so she could continue to see her best friend smile at her the way she did. The smile just for Nozomi, when she was laughing at a joke or trying to teach Nozomi Russian. It was the kind of smile that made Nozomi’s heart race, the kind of smile that made her want to kiss those soft lips, because they had to taste as sweet as they looked.

It was a smile that could break hearts and make the sun shine, and it was just for Nozomi.

It was her selfish wish, the only thing she could ever think to ask for, but it was all she wanted. She was happy with this. She was happy staying Eli’s best friend. She was happy with just being friends.

So all she asked was that please, please, she stayed by Eli’s side.

**Author's Note:**

> Quote/lyrics from Jenny by Studio Killers, title taken from the song by Florence and the Machine.


End file.
